Spanking Theatre

Spanking stories for the theatre between your ears


February 2014

Oh my gosh. The lupercalia one was so well written. Are you a professional author? Because you could definitely go places. I am very turned on and intriged and entertained and it is an amazing combination. Thank you!

Thanks for your kind words! To answer your question, no, I’m not a professional author, I write to fulfil a creative urge rather than profit. Of course, that was how E.L James got started. But her books (whatever you think of them) developed a buzz, people who read them couldn’t help but share them. Nothing I’ve written has achieved anything like that reaction.

The written word is difficult to propagate, unlike an image that can be consumed in a glance, stories take time to read and then imagine. In 18 months, my most popular story, Treasure Hunt has accumulated 313 likes. A titillating picture might rack that up in a day, a gif of some sexy fucking would probably achieve that in hours. Even though a story is ultimately more rewarding.

So maybe I’d best keep my day job, and be content to be one of the internet’s exciting little secrets, just waiting to be stumbled across…

Hanging by her Punishment Panties, waiting to be spanked and put to bed…

Open question of the month: If you could make any of my stories into a movie, which would you choose?

Imagine a film about spanking, playing at your local cinema, shocking some, seducing others. Which story would you love to see on the silver screen?

How do I Theatre?

Reader thechesterfield graciously writes:

As promised, I am writing to answer your inquiry of wanting to know a few things about yours truly. To quote you, the fantastic writer, “what turns you on, what stiffens your pearl, what moistens your lips? I don’t even know how you consume my delicate words. In bed, in a bath, in a comfy lounge chair? Nor do I know how such pleasure is delivered. With fingers or toys or amiable boys?”

So how do I tackle this? You’ve basically asked me the quintessential question I least like answering! What turns me on? I don’t think about “what turns me on” in a sexual or pornographic way, it’s more about the other person and whether they are true. I think if someone is true to themselves and their desires, the sexuality and lust is undeniable. It distills into a few very simple things: authenticity, sensuality, and intimacy…  You be you, let me be me, let’s use all of our senses to experience and enjoy each other…

My ”pearl” reacts to someone who is intelligent, creative, and has a great sense of humor with just the right amount of devious perversion. My sexual imagination flips like a photographic journal: Him with a drink in his hand, Him as he leans that certain way to shave, Him writing a love letter, Him throwing a map on the table and pointing to all the places he’s been (or wants to go), Him being Him, the intentional or casual expression behind his movement.  I can’t explain it any other way, if I have those simple things, the realness of his masculinity meeting the genuineness of who I am, what we do sexually has the potential to be amazing and unique to Us. It’s about the intimacy we create with one another that isn’t and will never be the same with anyone else, and we can make any of our desires possible. To recognize, feel, and experience someone’s potential….rawr.  I know, kind of abstact, huh.

Now, how do I consume your words? I’ve tasted them while curled up on my sofa and savored them in the tub. I’ve relished them lazing in bed on a quiet afternoon or while sitting in a crowded NYC subway. Typically I read a story all the way through and no matter how tantalizing your words and how they change the way my body feels, I abstain from anything naughty, I just want to enjoy the words and what you’ve written because as a reader that’s how I honor them.

Then afterward, maybe the next day or a week later, I come back and begin re-reading. I allow my imagination to fill in some of the space; I might see myself in the story and enjoy it as if it’s happening to me, or I might be a voyeur and get a sexy thrill just watching whomever I’ve put into the characters you’ve created. Either way, there always comes that moment when your words must be abandoned and my memory of your story, along with fingers and toys (amiable boys, perhaps someday) takes over.

The best writing allows me as a reader to let everything else go; the common relentless repetition of a day, the stress in my life, the worries over things I can’t control, drift away and the story you’ve created fills the space. When I can read something that can completely envelope me, rearrange the way I move, cause electrical impulses, make my breath heave and sigh, bring forth the erotic changes my body knows, I know I’ll achieve a pleasurable feeling that washes away whatever it was on my mind. Simply, it’s the escape. That’s why one of the most erotic things to me is being read to by a lover. It could be a fairytale, a book I enjoyed as a child, a letter they recite, something erotic or something mundane, His voice can be one of the most soothing and safe places in the world.

I’m not sure if that’s the answer you were looking for or expecting, but it’s the one I had today. Tomorrow, I might answer in the smuttiest way possible explaining in salacious detail the pinching of nipples and spreading of legs. You just caught me on a more thoughtful, in my brain kind of day. 

The first story I read was Lupercalia, and I found certain scenes deliciously satisfying. All of Claudia’s part was a favorite of mine, especially when she was in the ceremony room and the spanking began, causing her to ride the stone dildo. Just the thought of it now…. After that, I wasn’t sure anything could be as good as that scene. But you proved me wrong. They’re all so… Tantalizing…

That scene does seem to moisten places and get pulses racing.

Talking of tantalising, you may be excited to hear I’m adding the finishing touches to a brand new story, it should be online next month…

Oh, my. The stone phallus idea is just delicious. I really like the way you think. And write. :) I will say, I’m not generally a fan of whipping/flogging/caning, I prefer my spankings to come from bare hands. But that story still got me dripping wet, and I came harder than I have in a long time once I finally plunged myself onto my dildo! x

That sounds like a delightful way to enjoy that story. Kneeling over a dildo, its tip almost touching your intimate lips – but not quite.

You’d begin to read. Each paragraph increasing the tingling, the urge to sink down and impale yourself. How long will you be able to resist? 

What imagined scene will make you surrender to your desire? Being undressed, caned and then dressed again by Miss? Baring your bum and counting your whacks in Latin? The secret joy of going home to play? Or perhaps it will be the thought of being pursued and caught, whipped and taken? Or the delights of being sensually bathed and intimately massaged?

Or perhaps you’ll make it right to the end, imagining what it would be like to hover over a stone phallus as an erotic dance unfolds ahead of you, whilst the cruel whip stings your bottom behind you.

However you read it, however you imagine it, I wish you all a toe-curlingly awesome happy ending that leaves you breathless…

Spanking Haiku #19: Conversation Piece

Visitors gawp at

My handsome carved seat

Stone dildo proud

Venus spanking Cupid


Image: Venus Whipping Cupid with Roses, Giovanni Luigi Valesio

Why is Venus spanking Cupid?

Did you know that long before the modern world chose Valentine’s Day as its designated day of love, there was the ancient Roman festival of Lupercalia?

Did you know that it began on the Ides (the 13th) and climaxed on the 15th of February, and consisted of purification and fertility rites that held such significance in the Roman calendar that the month of Februarius was named after them?

Although Lupercalia was a fertility rite, scholars believe its proximity to the contemporary St Valentine’s Day is purely coincidental. And that is why Venus is spanking Cupid in a 17th century woodcut. It depicts the echoes of half-remembered rituals still reverberating.

If you have someone special in your life, you are blessed. Tell them how much you love them, then show how much, by baring their bottom and spanking them pink. Or send them this post and be waiting ready for a spanking when they get home.

You’ll be reviving a tradition that goes back over 2000 years. Spanking is love. A warm bottom and a contented heart. Such is the wisdom of the ancients.

And if you need any further inspiration, lend me your imagination, and I’ll whisper you a story




Today is the first day of February.

But have you ever wondered where the name of month comes from? 

You might know January is named after Janus. He was the Roman god of the doorway, (the Latin word for door is ianua), which is fitting given January is the entrance to the year.

March is also named after a god: Mars, the Roman god of war, as the beginning of Spring marked the start of the military campaigning season.

But what about February?

It may surprise you to learn that February was named after the Roman purification ritual of Februa, an ancient rite which was later subsumed by the purging and fertility festival of Lupercalia.

The 1st century historian Plutarch described Lupercalia like this:

“At this time many of the noble youths and of the magistrates run up and down through the city naked, for sport and laughter striking those they meet with shaggy thongs. And many women of rank also purposely get in their way, and like children at school present their hands to be struck, believing that the pregnant will thus be helped in delivery, and the barren to pregnancy.”

These thongs, leather whips cut from sacrificed goats, were also called Februa. Look closely at the central figure in the mosaic depicting the Roman month of Februarius above, and you’ll see a whip.

In other words, the roots of February’s name are in an ancient naked whipping festival.

Isn’t it funny how countless millions around the world will see and write the word February this month, and never wonder about its origins. The kinky secret hidden by the ancients in plainsight.

Of course, those in on the secret have long appreciated the virtues of flogging; for us, it has always been worth celebrating.

Repost: February’s Kinky Secret

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