There was an earthquake here in the south of England last night. 

Seriously.

It woke me. I peered into the darkness as the house shook and creaked around me. Distant windows squeaked. Faraway furniture rattled.

And I dozed back to sleep I couldn’t help wondering: if Amelie was right, and people are having orgasms all the time nearby, there must have been some who were fucking right when the tremors hit. How cool would that have been? 

To climax as the bed shook underneath you, the ground’s quivering oscillations adding to your own.

The ultimate threesome with Mother Earth.