Spanking Theatre

Spanking stories for the theatre between your ears


January 2017

Your favourite Naughty Game?


A new series of Naughty Games for Couples has begun, with two new games:

  1. The Hour (41 likes)
  2. Grand Tour (17)

And here’s the popularity chart of the original naughty games, Inspections for Girls has proved very popular, it’s just racked up its 600th fan…

  1. Inspections for Girls (600 likes)
  2. Squirm (324)
  3. Panty Pulling Chair (220)
  4. Sensations (219)
  5. Bottom Inspection (169)
  6. Dildo Ritual (161)
  7. Secret Reading (134)
  8. Clothesline (132)
  9. Ups and Downs (120)
  10. Words (109)
  11. Throne (97)
  12. Naughty Panties (92)
  13. Naked Reading (88)
  14. Straddle (69)
  15. Spanking Machine (45)
  16. Figging with Ginger (41)
  17. Wet Panties (37)
  18. Fucking on a Train (23)
  19. Drawing Lines (18)

Do explore, and enjoy!

Naughty Games for Two #2: Grand Tour

This game is inspired not only by my poem Ten, but also the story Treasure Hunt. Both involving moving around the home, and spanking and playing in different locations. This game is a unique erotic Grand Tour of your own home.

This is also a game of variety; interspersing spankings with pleasurings – along with the changes of location, introduces breaks that help give the bottom time to recover. As a result, they’ll be able to tolerate a much longer spanking than if it was delivered in one continuous whacking.

Another great feature of this game is that the top will plan what happens in advance, allowing play to flow more naturally, escalating towards the climax without halting to think – what shall we do next? Though what unfolds will be an enjoyable surprise to the bottom.

How to Play

First, collect together all your toys and your spanking implements.

The bottom is sent to stand in the corner, whilst the top sits down with a blank piece of paper. On the page, create 3 columns: one for Place, one for Spanking Implement, and one for Pleasuring.

The top then starts filling in each row. First, by picking a place (usually a room in the home, or for those with private gardens, maybe somewhere outside).

Next, the top chooses a spanking implement, (remember, one of those can be their own hand). The same implement can be chosen more than once if you don’t have enough items to select a different one each time.

Finally, the top chooses a pleasuring. It can be experienced by either partner or both together. Make it something short and sweet, some ideas are:

  • A minute licking her slit or sucking his cock.
  • A minute of masturbation.
  • A minute on a dildo or a vibe.
  • A minute caressing or inspecting.
  • A minute fucking, vaginally or anally.

When the top chooses the activities, they should do so in a way that escalates their intensity. So the game begins with modest spankings and light pleasurings, and as the game reaches its finale, the bottom is sore, and both partners are on the edge of coming.

A sample row of the list might look something like this:

Kitchen — Wooden spatula — Ribbed pink dildo

Yes, kind of like Cluedo, but with spankings and sex toys.

The top should aim for a list with about 10 entries, depending on the number of suitable locations in your home.

When the top finishes the list, they should take the spanking implement and any toys required to each corresponding location. If a toy or implement is being used more than one, just put it in the first location, and then when you both reach the second location, the bottom can be sent back to the original room to obediently collect the items required.

Optional idea – when the top places items in a room, why not hide them as in Treasure Hunt? Then, when you both arrive in that location later on, tell the bottom what to look for, and start a 3 minute timer. If they find the implement, perhaps they’ll get a minute of spanking with it – but if they fail to find it, perhaps they’ll get double. Likewise, finding a hidden sex toy might win them double time with it. Perhaps failing to find it means it doesn’t get used at all…

When the items have been placed, you’re ready to begin playing. Summon the bottom from the corner, and go to the first location on the list, escorting them by the hand, ear, hair or an erogenous area of your choice.

Once at the location, the top announces the spanking implement (and starts the timer if it’s been hidden). When it’s time for the spanking itself, the bottom is put into the top’s favoured position and has their panties pulled down (if they’re not already naked). And a minute or two of spanking of administered.

Once spanked, the top announces the chosen act of pleasuring. If the original choice was an item that was hidden and not found, the top can be pleasured for a while instead. Neither partner should come until the final location, if they do, they should suffer a forfeit.

When the pleasuring ends, it’s time to move onto the next location. Repeat the same process, but this time using different items.

Continue until the last location, and then, after the final spanking, perhaps one or both partners will be allowed to come.

And then once you’ve finished playing, do keep the list. Next time you play, you might want to use it. You could even build up a quickstart collection of lists, and pick one at random each time you play…

Variation – The Solo Tour

Although this game does work best for couples. This game can also be played alone – by writing out the list yourself, and then imagining yourself being led around the house by your fantasy disciplinarian.

Even better, if you have a remote partner, tell them the rooms, spanking implements and toys you have, and ask them to create a list for you.

If you like a very sore bottom, spank yourself for one minute in each location. If you’re new to self-spanking or prefer lighter spankings, make it 30 seconds. Afterwards, you may masturbate for up to a minute. When playing, always stop if you get close to the edge, so you’re ready to climax in the final location.



So, who will you play with? Perhaps you should tag them with this post…


Ordinary decent citizens of the Real World

Tolerate poverty, pollution, wretched wars

And then call kinky sex… weird

The 12 Inspections of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas, my true love inspected me.

Naked. Kneeling. Bottom up, cheeks held apart.

On the second day of Christmas, my true love inspected me.

Naked, standing straight, elbows clasped behind my back.

With my clothes neatly folded in a pile at my feet.

On the third day of Christmas, my true love inspected me.

Naked but for a crotch rope, tugged tight against my cleft.

Tied to the bedframe, like a tethered animal.

On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love inspected me.

Cuffed naked to the four corners of my bed.

Squirming, seeping, aching to be read…

On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love edged me.

Five. Tormenting. Times…

On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love inspected me.

Naked as skillful fingertips tickled and teased my breasts.

Rolling and pinching, I obediently unflinching.

On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love inspected me.

Naked, as a firm hand gently cupped my crotch.

Just feeling the aching heat of my bare wet slit.

On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love inspected me.

As a treat, I got to don my school uniform.

My knickers were soaked when the time came to pull them down.

On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love inspected me.

I bent over naked, and touched my toes.

Clenching a hairbrush between my bottom cheeks.

On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love inspected me.

Naked in the dark, inquisitive fingers roaming.

Discovering my secrets, in the gloaming.

On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love inspected me.

I sat naked, ramrod straight, impaled upon a dildo chair.

Legs spread wide, bottom hole stretched and full.

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love pleasured me.

Naked. No more secrets. All my pages read.

I came exhausted.

Spanked and fucked upon my bed.

How do you talk to your crush?

Wow, what a profound question.

It’s one many of us spend our adolescence wistfully asking ourselves,
and some, many years beyond. Scouring our psyches, as if searching for
the long-lost instruction manual to our minds, which might at last
provide the answers to our own tumultuous feelings.

As a writer on sexuality, I’m a great proponent of the value of
fantasies. But the trouble comes when the fantasy figure is a real
person, and you’re desperate for that fantasy to come true. So, this is what I know: you can not talk to your crush until you understand a fundamental aspect of your emotional self, and that is Limerence.

If you’ve never heard of it, read the entry on Wikipedia
now, then go back and read it again and see how many of the symptoms
you recognise. Seriously. It’s that important. Basic psychology like
this should be taught in schools.

Trembling, flushing, palpitations, fatigue. Awkwardness, stuttering,
shyness, confusion. Insomnia, loss of appetite. All the classic symptoms
of anxiety. Yet what are you being so anxious about?

A crush is an intense and (as yet) unreciprocated attraction. Some might even call it an infatuation.

The problem is, you’ve unilaterally decided that a particular individual is The One.
And now you want to talk to them. And you want them to like you too. That’s
putting a lot of pressure on yourself isn’t it? You might blow it, and
then The One might shun you. No wonder most people just fantasise
about their crushes from afar, unwilling to risk bursting the fragile
bubble of their dreams.

Yet you talk to people all the time. So
what’s stopping you from talking freely to this particular individual?
Limerence, that’s what.

So you can not talk to your crush until you
recognise, and master, your own limerence. And that means confronting a
fundamental home truth…

  • I have no right to another person’s affections

it down as an affirmation. Pretend you’re in detention, spank your
bottom and write it out a hundred times if you have to. Until you’ve properly understood that you’ve no
right to expect the reaction you desire from someone else.

Once you
truly accept that, and stop thinking in terms of success or rejection, you’ll be less emotionally invested in the outcome of talking to this
individual. After all, your conversation with them should be natural, playful and
mutually enjoyable. It shouldn’t feel like you’re giving a speech
entitled “Why I’m the one for you”, live on national television.

The late brilliant Professor Randy Pausch liked to say that obstacles aren’t there to block you, they are tests to force you to prove yourself.

are an important life lesson. They encourage us to master our own
emotions, but not to the extent we become cold and distant. A crush is
an essential rite of passage, an uncheatable test of your emotional

To pass you must accept that The One is not
an object to be desired or a trophy to be won, but an emotional being
with feelings every bit as valid as yours. Someone to talk with,
not be talked to – only then can you truly connect.

Mastering limerence is the doorway. But those who persevere will find an incredible world of authentic love lies beyond.

Believe me, I know.

I love your stories mister, sometimes I get lost while reading them. I’ve imagined me being the main character anxiously waiting for spanking or waiting in bed my clit trobbing waiting for my governess to get me after my night of soaking wet panties.

For a writer, there’s no greater praise than hearing of a reader getting lost in a story.

What an age of wonder we inhabit. One where our words can effortlessly
travel across our planet, falling into the eyes of myriad readers,
conjuring into being unique new worlds in each receptive imagination, as
if by magic.

What power there is in words when they are capable of transporting your consciousness into another character’s mind. As if you were donning an enchanted mask, granting you the power to momentarily experience reality through another’s eyes.

The characters in my stories are not contrivances. They are meticulously crafted as vessels for readers’ imaginations to inhabit, virtual costumes to dress up and role-play in. As those who’ve read the Beginner’s Guide to Self-Spanking will surely now understand…

I write because participating in this sorcery is its own
reward. I consider myself immensely privileged to be able to conjure intimate images inside the minds of people I may never meet.

So consider what I write my gift.

From my imagination, to yours.

So farewell 2016. Let’s resolve to fill the new year with plenty of spankings!

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