Spanking Theatre

Spanking stories for the theatre between your ears


January 2019

Could you do a public punishment challenge? Something you can do in public without getting caught, but it’s more erotic because other people are around?

Such a challenge has already been written, it’s called Being Naughty.

It suggests several discreet naughty activities, that you might like to try or use as a basis for your own hijinks, such as:

  • Read a spanking story in a public place, like a cafe or a park, so you won’t be able to touch yourself.
  • Go out (to go shopping, or for a run, or to meet friends) without panties, or wearing a butt plug.
  • Go into a cubicle in a public lavatory, or a toilet at a friend’s home, and masturbate.
  • Go
    out and buy a spanking implement, like a wooden ruler, hairbrush or
    some slippers. If you possess a school uniform, wear it underneath your
    coat. Imagine you’ve been sent out by your disciplinarian.
  • Go
    out and buy something with naughty connotations, like a ginger root. Or
    some condoms and a cucumber. Then play with your purchases when you get

And if you’ve any suggestions for discreet naughtiness you’d like to share, just reply to this post, I’m sure your fellow readers would love to read them…

It’ll be interesting to see if the idea of being thoroughly spanked in the crease is as arousing to others as it is it me

Yes it will.

I’ve had a story idea about elastic spanking between the cheeks in my notebook for years, but never elaborated it. But given the feedback I’ve had from readers over the last few days, I’m seriously thinking of turning it into a proper story. It’s got a great premise, it could be marvellous…

What if….you wrote a bottom hole self-spanking challenge

If that’s something other readers would be interested in trying, I could certainly write it. Having the right implement would be the major challenge, the best item is a thin whippy crop, like the ones described in this post. Most implements are too big and inflexible to be used on a hard to reach spot like the anus.

Rubber bands though, can be used. Given the sensitivity of the region, a stinging flick is much more appropriate than the thuddy impact of a conventional spanking. If that sounds enticing, raise your hands…

can you add more games??

Hands up who wants more games?

And do you want more naughty games or more self-spanking challenges?

The Golden Rule

An anonymous reader asks:

A passage in “Coming of Age” really struck me:

“But I chatted like my
mentor had taught me, with honest curiosity rather than
self-aggrandising bravado, with the respect due to another human being.”

It got me wondering about a humanistic philosophy of sexual dominance.
I’m wondering if you’ve encountered anything I could read on or around
that subject?

Mutual respect is the cornerstone of
sexual dominance, it’s what separates consensual kinky activities from physical abuse. It is something that every good
BDSM player believes in: that those in our care should be developed and
lifted up, not suppressed and exploited. Consent is a precious gift, it should be handled with the reverance it deserves.

Respect for your fellow human beings is fundamental to a healthy sexual identity. Without it, sex becomes just a succession of transient conquests, complex individuals reduced to warm holes to fuck, driven by a immature, selfish desire for orgasmic satisfaction.

But how would you behave towards others if you could never, ever, achieve another orgasm?

There is a name for this philosophy: Asceticism. It involves eschewing sensual pleasures, of prioritising spiritual goals, and resisting desire. It is central to many great religions, including Christianity and Buddhism.

Now I’m not proposing readers swear an oath of celibacy, or adopt the lifestyle of a monk. But denial of sensual pleasures is an important aspect of BDSM play, and not just for submissives. The first stage of taking control over another is to master one’s own desires. Dominants should be mindful, both of their own bodies, as well as those of their partners.

Control of desire earns authority, control of the self leads to enlightenment.

And an enlighted mindful player attains superpowers.

So, dear reader, in answer to your question, I have no particular posts to suggest, because respectful dominance is a lifelong journey, guided by whatever philosophies you choose to follow, or faiths you believe.

Choose to live your life by The Golden Rule, the ethic of reciprocity.

It is an idea as old as civilisation itself.

It is simply…


I’ve enjoyed your work for a while now, but I recently had occasion to read several stories from authentic Victorian erotica (namely from the pornographic magazine The Pearl from the early 1880s) and I was really struck by how similar your style is to a lot of the work there, minus the hilariously awkward Victorian euphemisms. Anyway, I just wanted to compliment you on your authenticity and elegantly old-fashioned style while keeping it fresh and modern.

Thank you for not just those immernsely kind words, but for giving me an excuse to introduce readers to The Pearl. For those who haven’t encountered it, The Pearl was a 19th century periodical of erotica – and here’s an archive of what it published, before it was abruptly shut down by prudish Victorian authorities almost 150 years ago.

Some of its posts are very lewd, some are unexpectedly erudite, probably reflecting the diversity of sexualities of those who wrote for it. As Wikipedia explains: “the general format of the periodical was to publish three serial erotic tales simultaneously, devoted to sex in high society, incest, and flagellation, respectively.” 

High society sex is an interesting reflection of the Victorian class obsessions, whilst incest is one of those transgressive taboos that also features in the French erotic book The Young Girls’ Handbook of Good Manners, written a few decades later. And spanking and flogging were just as popular in Victorian days as they are now. 

Perhaps you’ll see a certain formality in Victorian erotic writing, an appreciation of process, of scene and character. All attributes that I value in storytelling, which lead to that teasing sense of anticipation that I hope I’ve been able to capture in my own writing.

I encourage interested readers to explore, who knows what you’ll uncover in the dusty musty archives of the internet, an infinite library with no shelves, which our Victorian ancestors would have loved deeply indeed.

Self-Spanking Challenge #16: A Good Hard Caning

The 16th instalment of the Self-Spanking Challenge! Newcomers can find previous challenges here.

Challenge – Day 16

A highly popular fantasy for many is imagining themselves back at school, being caned by a
strict headmistress or headmaster. In this challenge you’ll learn how to set up an implement that delivers not just the stinging whack of a cane, but one that leaves pink stripes on your bottom…

know many readers crave the satisfaction of a warm, stinging,
well-smacked bottom, but lack someone to give it to them. A hairbrush can suffice, but some will crave harder, stingier sensations.

If you’ve read my story Carrot and Stick, you’ll already be familiar with the idea of a self-administered whacking. But you might have
had trouble picturing how this would work in practice. If so, this post
should help explain how

Part of the challenge here is procuring a spanking implement you may not yet own. You’re looking for a whacking rod that is thin and springy, as their cross-section is smaller,
they’re much quieter and discreet than slippers and hairbrushes — a useful bonus if you’ve family or housemates nearby.

need a rod springy enough to place against your bottom, which then can
be pulled back and released to deliver a hard enough whack. Fibre-glass
is springier than rattan, so better for self-spanking.

Just search your favourite sex toy supplier for “riding crop”, and you’ll be presented with lots of choices. Even Amazon sells a selection, and they’re much cheaper than vibrators.

You can also buy smooth round-section fibre-glass and
carbon-fibre rods from well-stocked craft and model shops. Various diameters are available, the wider the
rod, the less flexible it will be, but you can try before you buy, just pull the rod back a little and let it smack into your palm.

you have your rod, find somewhere to position it. You want to wedge one
end of the rod into a little gap at just below waist height, and
perpendicular to the gap, so you can bend over in front of it. This is
the arrangement described towards the end of Carrot and Stick.

key is finding the right position for the rod, it should be wedged
tight and shouldn’t rattle. The best way to do this is to wrap the cane
with something like a flannel or a t-shirt, which will wedge it firmly
in place. If you’ve done it right, it should be virtually silent, with
just a lovely faint swicking sound when you pull it back and release it.

Once the rod is firmly held, then you can pull the rod back like this:


See how much it bends back?

Once you have your rod set up, all you need to do is bend over in front of the rod (imagine yourself
on the left hand side of the image above). Then reach behind, pull the
rod backwards, and let go…

best results, you should spend some time getting into the mood for your
spanking, and imagine the circumstances of your punishment.

If you fantasise about a school setting, you might like to dress up in school uniform and
watch videos of classroom canings, before its time for you to bend over in front of your own cane. Your skirt will be lifted and panties pulled down, and you’ll feel the cane resting against your bare
bottom. You’ll imagine being scolded by Sir, or Miss, before pulling the rod back, letting go, and a moment later —the swish, and  the whack, and the hot stinging stripe searing across your cheeks.

Once your caning has finished, you may like to pretend you’ve been sent to detention, where you’re told to sit down on your sore bottom and begin
writing. Perhaps you’ll be writing lines, or an essay about how you were punished.

Write by hand, and if you want to post what you’ve written on your blog, you can take pictures of the pages.

Try describing your experience –
what character did you choose to play, why were you punished and who delivered your caning? What did it feel like to be caned, how did it differ from the spankings you’ve previously experienced?

If you post your write-up, do add the tags #selfspankingchallenge and #selfspankingchallenge16.

once you have a whacking rod of your own set up, I hope it will enrich your playtimes. It’s not just a new way of reading my stories – whilst bending over in front of your cane, it’s also permits a much sorer spanking, one whose stripes and sting might linger into the morning after…

The Beginner’s Guide to Self-Spanking


This is a repost, the original post fell victim to Tumblr’s filters.

Self-spanking is a lot like masturbation. In private, many enjoy doing it. But you’ll rarely hear many people talking about it.

I’m often asked for advice on self-spanking
by readers who are intrigued by the experience, yet who feel awkward
spanking themselves. This is, I believe, because spanking is more than
just smacks on the bottom, it’s as much a mental experience as a
physical one. Engaging your imagination is the key to a satisfying
spanking, whether you’re alone or with a partner. So in this guide, I
hope to address the practicalities of self-spanking, and provide some
ideas for creating fulfilling and arousing playtimes.

First, let’s consider a question, asked by many, especially those yet to try it.

Why would anyone want to spank themselves?

My answer is that fundamentally, self-spanking is just another form of play.

about it this way: vibrators stimulate nerves in the pussy, and
spankings stimulate nerves in the bottom. Whilst the sensations might be
different, impacts rather than rubbings and vibrations, they are
transmitted by exactly the same nerves: the Pudendal and the Perineal
nerves. When your brain receives signals from these nerves, it
interprets them as coming from the whole genital area. As a result, a
side-effect of spankings is the erotic sensation in the genitals, even
though those areas are not actually being touched.

The Pudendal
and the Perineal nerves are located in the lower parts of the buttocks,
near the anus and just above the tops of the thighs. That’s why this
‘sit-spot’ area is the favoured area for spanking, it’s where smacks are
felt most intensely and pleasurably.

Spankings can also, of
course, be painful; that’s why they’ve historically been a form of
punishment. Pain is your body’s early warning signal, alerting you to
the fact that your body is at risk of damage and injury. So normally,
our response to these sensations is aversion, to move away from what’s
causing the damage. Adrenaline surges through us, our heart races, our
minds concentrate. But if you’re over someone’s knee being spanked,
running away is no longer an option; you must instead grimace and bear

When pain is unavoidable, our brains start to release natural
opiates called endorphins, which not only dull the pain signals
received, so they do not become overwhelming, but also produce a floaty
euphoric feeling. Our bodies have a limited stockpile of endorphins,
once they’re released it takes a while to replenish. Which is one of the
reasons why those with spanked bottoms are often sent to the corner: so
they get to feel the soreness and stinging they’ve received when the
fug of their endorphins wear off.

It is this combination of
arousing tingles in the genitals, adrenaline rushes and natural highs
that, when performed right, can make spankings so pleasurable. So if you
enjoy the sensation of a smacked bottom, there’s nothing wrong with
delivering that feeling to yourself.

Hence I consider
self-spanking a form of masturbation. I regard it as a form of self-love
rather than self-harm, a form of self-pleasuring rather than
self-mortification. Spanking is a complementary physical sensation to
the joys of genital rubbing, and as those who’ve experienced a spanking
already know, well-smacked bottoms tend to lead to the most intense

As a result, for many who enjoy spanking stories,
self-spanking is just a natural extension of how they masturbate, giving
them the chance to experience for themselves some of the physical
sensations they’ve just been reading about. After all, what else could
make story about submission any more erotic, than physically submitting
yourself to the story?

Yet it would be wrong to consider
self-spankings as an activity of last resort, an ersatz experience when
no spanker is nearby. On the contrary, it provides a way for readers to
play in the privacy of their own homes, to indulge their own fantasies,
without weirding out a partner or revealing what they’d rather keep to
themselves. It’s the same reason why many with regular sexual partners
still like to play with themselves.

Having explained why
self-spanking is popular, you might be getting curious, tempted to try
the experience for yourself. So the next section will explain some of
the basic practicalities for the benefit of beginners.

How to Get Started

yourself a spanking is as simple as reaching back and slapping your own
bottom. But there’s a few practical aspects worth considering that will
make the experience more intense, and enjoyable.  

The first is
choosing what you’ll spank yourself with, whilst you can use the palm of
your hand, you’ll achieve a far better sensation with a proper spanking
implement. This is because of science! Specifically, the mechanics of
levers – a spanking implement will multiply the force you apply to
yourself, giving a harder whack for the same effort. Using an implement
also means you’ll experience a single impact sensation, having your palm
sting at the same time as your bottom tends to break the spell of what
you’re imagining.

Good items to use for spanking can be found all
around the house. Try slippers, flip-flops, wooden rulers, hairbrushes,
wooden spoons, spatulas, and bath-brushes. Then if, once you get into
it, you want to get more serious about bottom smacking, you can add a
proper spanking paddle to your basket the next time you go sex toy

If you’re not an experienced spankee you’ll quickly
discover some implements are more painful than others. Generally
speaking, the harder and heavier the material, the less forgiving it
will be. So sturdy hairbrushes will hurt more than light balsa wood
spatulas. Implements that flex, like flip-flops and slippers will be
more forgiving than rigid items like rulers and brushes.

The next
issue to consider is what position to adopt whilst spanking yourself.
For this, choose whatever you find most comfortable, or best fits the
fantasy you’re imagining. You might want to bend over a pile of pillows,
or the edge of a sofa, or straddle the corner of your bed.

positions you might try are leaning against a wall, over the back of a
chair or a banister, of kneeling on cushions with your bum in the air.
The possibilities are too numerous to list, just choose one that
supports your own weight comfortably, and leaves your strongest arm free
to reach around to apply your chosen implement to your bottom.

position you choose will dictate the angle that you’ll spank yourself
from, usually reaching back and around. For a different sensation you
can try lying on your back and lifting your legs, allowing you to spank
in between them, this position is particularly good for smacking your
sit-spots, and enjoying the ‘shame’ of exposing yourself.

duration of your spanking is also up to you to decide, it will depend on
the implement you use and your own tolerance of pain. The key here is
to start small, and build up until you find the degree of soreness you
find most satisfying.

If you’re new to self-spanking, you might
like to choose a softer implement like a slipper, and give yourself a
single smack on each cheek, then pause and feel the warmth on your
bottom. Then spank again, maybe adding a couple more smacks before your
next pause. Perhaps when your bottom starts getting sore, you can take
break, imagine you’ve been sent to the corner, and stand facing the
wall, feeling cool air wafting over your hot cheeks. Then maybe your
imaginary disciplinarian decides your spanking wasn’t sufficient, and
your brattiness earns you a trip across their knee for seconds.

you’re comfortable with the sensation of being spanked, try timing
yourself, so you can measure the duration of your spanking in minutes.

last consideration is privacy. Unlike masturbation, which you can do
virtually silently in your own bedroom, the noise of a spanking is
unavoidable. This shouldn’t be a problem if you live alone or with a
kinky partner, but otherwise you’ll be limiting your self-spankings to
times when you’re alone in your home.

So, that’s the physical
practicalities of self-spanking, now let’s consider the mental side, and
in particular, how do you make it erotic?

The Importance of Turning Yourself On

Here I’m going to introduce three ways how you might eroticise a self-spanking session.

The first is what I’d call Spank-As-You-Read, and is described in Naughty Game #6 – Naughty Reading.
This involves reading a spanking story, and imagining yourself as
somehow inside it, so when you read about spankings, you get to
experience them vicariously. The benefit here is the story is scripted
for you, it’s like a roller-coaster, you just buckle in and enjoy the

Perhaps you already masturbate when you read spanking
stories. Imagine if, instead of riding to orgasm, you put your fingers
of your weaker hand between your legs, and used your stronger hand to
rub your bottom with a slipper. Then, the rubs would soon turn into
spanks, and you’d begin to grind against your fingers. You’d smack
slowly, savouring the sound of the slap, the lingering sting.

you’ll be immersed in the story, your imagination engaged, can you
imagine you’re in it? Perhaps you’ll act out what you’re reading, speak
the dialogue aloud. A climax will be inevitable, but this one will be
different, you’ll end the tale with a delightfully warm bottom of your
own, and a head full of delicious thoughts.

second way to act out a fantasy of your own. This gives you the freedom
to improvise, and indulge the kind of activities that turn you on. There
is an art to getting into the right mindset for make-believe though, if
you find this difficult, you might want to warm yourself up with some
suitable erotica first, either visual or the written word.

you’ll imagine a favourite scenario, like reporting to the headmaster,
or being sent to bed early by Daddy. Or even to re-enact a spanking
picture of video you really enjoy. You might want to dress up for the
occasion, invent a bit of a back story, apologise or plead aloud when
it’s made clear your bare bottom is due for a whacking. Perhaps there
will be cornertime, writing of lines or a confession no one will ever
read. Just engage your imagination and invent a scene you’ve always
wanted to come true.

Here are the challenges I’ve posted so far. Enjoy your adventures…

Day 1 – The Fascination of Spanking

Day 2 – Choices and Consequences

Day 3 – Dressing Up

Day 4 – Anticipation

Day 5 – Cornertime

Day 6 – Alter Ego

Day 7 – Being Naughty

Day 8 – Bottom Inspection

Day 9 – Pillow Hump

Day 10 – Echoes

Day 11 – Christmas Story

Day 12 – Star in a Story

Day 13 – The Proper Way to Watch a Spanking Video

Day 14 – A Note From School

Day 15 – Fire and Ice

Several readers have been in touch asking how to incorporate more bottom-smacking into their play. So if getting more spankings is one of your resolutions this year, you might be interested in these playtime ideas…



Is your willpower


Than the feeble words

I whisper

Into your ear

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