Spanking Theatre

Spanking stories for the theatre between your ears


September 2019

any tips on first time self spanking??? I feel so awkward any time I try that I end up just quitting because I feel dumb, without any spanking even taking place, and also frustrated.

You’re not alone, I hear of this awkwardness regularly.

My top tip is to think of self-spanking as just another kind of masturbation, but with smacks rather than strokes. That means engaging your main sexual organ (the one between your ears), and getting into the right mood before a single smack lands on your cheeks.

Ask yourself:

  • Why are you being spanked?
  • What’s the fantasy you’re imagining yourself part of?
  • Who are you imagining spanking you?

Hear their voice in your mind. Imagine them telling you to pull down your panties.

The activities listed within the Guide to Self Spanking are intended to help readers construct and explore their own fantasies. Get good at that first, practice bending over, touching your toes or across a chair, or lying on your bed with a pile of pillows beneath your hips.

Before a self-spanking, boys should be hard, and girls soaking wet. If you’re not sufficiently aroused, you have more imagining to do. Read a story if you need to, that’s what they’re intended for.

Then, slowly, you can begin to add actual spanks to your fantasy. If you’re struggling to take the initiative, many have found the approach described in The Proper Way to Watch a Spanking Video very helpful. Namely, when someone on screen gets spanked, you get spanked too.

Self-spanking isn’t just about smacking your own bottom, it’s about creating your own immersive fantasies, with you safely in control. Do it right, and you’ll find you don’t even have to smack that hard.

Remember, the buttocks only appear to feel a spanking, where it’s really experienced is inside your head…

Reading everybody’s confessions is fun so I thought I’d send in my own. It’s more of a funny story than a confession, really, but there was a night when my master washed my mouth out with soap and a few weeks later I used the same kind of soap to wash my hands… There was a very confusing couple of seconds where I had to think about why exactly the smell of soap was making me so wet. Thankfully it didn’t take me long to remember and the scent of honeysuckle has made me laugh ever since.

How delightfully Proustian!

I wonder what other everyday items have special secret erotic connotations for readers?

And what is the sense that is triggered?

Perhaps it’s catching a glimpse of something?

Or hearing a sound?

Or maybe a smell?

Or a taste?

Or might it be a texture or touch?

Do post your memories…

Ive been masturbating without permission almost daily and my mistress doesn’t know, should I tell her?

I believe I have already answered this question.

Of course you should confess.

It sounds like you need a reminder of why your Mistress insists on your obedience, and why she is going to need to pull down your panties…

Hello i have something to confess to you. for the last few weeks ive been re-reading your stories as i pleasure myself then leaving them open on my computer hoping my girlfriend will find them and think i deserve the same as the poor young lady whos pain i enjoyed reading about. maybe when i get home this afternoon there will a pair of punishment panties waiting on a chair for me. all i really want is to lie on my tummy with a sore bright red bottom and mascara on my cheeks. your reader Marte.

It seems it isn’t just a bright red bottom and mascara-streaked cheeks that you crave, it’s getting caught. So, perhaps it’s time to lay a trail of clues, slowly escalating your jeopardy, until being discovered is inevitable.

Step 1 of getting caught, leaving stories open to be found, but that’s quite subtle and easily overlooked.

Step 2 might be to put a post-it note on the page of a dictionary that contains the definition of “spank”. You could write the url of this site on the note, and see if she notices you name on this post.

Step 3 might be sending her links to your favourite spanking stories, and innocently commenting: “you might like this”. Whilst you’re wearing punishment panties pulled up tight.

Step 4 might be pleasuring yourself whilst she’s nearby, where there’s a risk of her walking in and catching you.

Step 5 is sending her a full and frank confession, as described in this post.

Escalate slowly, keep dropping clues, and you won’t have to wait long for the sore red bottom you crave…

I like to be humiliated. Everyone thinks I’m so good and sweet, but I really just need to be taken over someone’s knee and my wet pussy put on display. I’d really like someone to grab me, someone with authority, tell me that I’m just a little slut, bend me over and reveal me to everyone, then spank me. After the spanking I’d like to be held open, so everyone can see not only see my red bottom, but my dripping pussy. Have them talk about me and touch me, be released face red, everyone knowing


Everyone has secrets, even those who outwardly appear sweet and innocent; especially those people, I’d say. Because we often subvert what we might otherwise fear into our turn-ons. The prospect of public shame and humiliation can be terrifying, but that’s what gives those thoughts their immense erotic charge. Thank you for sharing.

I wonder what will be slipped into the confession box next?

Write a naughty game about nipple pleasure and nipple play please

Looking at the current list of naughty games I can see your point, it seems the nipples have been rather unfairly neglected.

But I do have a few ideas in my notebook, so if there’s much demand I’ll endeavour to write them up and post them soon.

Any other kinds of naughty games readers would like to see?

i’ve been naughty & pleasuring myself all afternoon without my miss’s permission, but she’s out of state and would never know if I don’t tell her. should I still tell her ive been a bad girl even though I won’t get a spanking from her?

A naughty girl who breaks her disciplinarian’s rules should always admit her wrong-doing.

Perhaps you need to refresh yourself on why we are strict with you, why we set rules and and why we pull down your panties.

We disciplinarians ask for very little apart from your obedience. We set your rules for your own good, because we know you need limits, we know you crave structure.

We expect you to be a good girl. Not a perfect girl, but a good girl. One who is honest about her behaviour, and who understands that punishment is the price for rule-breaking. And one who will accept whatever punishment is decided, contritely and willingly.

A bad girl is a dishonest girl. Bad girls don’t deserve the privilege of someone strict to look out for them.

So, I expect you to send Miss a message confessing your misbehaviour, and in it, I expect you to include a link to this post. Even if she’s a thousand miles away, you are still subject to her rules, and she can decide on the punishment you deserve. 

Perhaps she’ll get you to spank yourself, or have you sit on your bare bottom and write a long essay on honesty and the importance of rules.

And by the end, I’d expect you’ll have a better understanding of what it takes to be a good girl, and a much greater appreciation of the strict lady who cares enough about you to spank your bottom…

I just want to say that because of this blog I got past the fear of spanking myself. As I sit with a sore, red bottom, I am grateful for this blog and continue to hope to find someone who enjoys this with me.

If I could spank every reader who needed it, I gladly would.

But life is busy and distances large.

Fortunately, you don’t need to have a disciplinarian to feel the warming sting of a well-smacked bottom. As you’re discovering, you can play in the privacy of your own home, at your own pace, to a fantasy of your own choosing.

If you’re inexperienced, it’s often better that way. If you’re going to ask another to inflict pain on you, it’s worth spending time developing trust first. A great spanker can be a source of tremendous satisfaction. If you’re self-sufficient, there’s no need to rush into bad relationships.

I hope the activities within the Guide to Self Spanking will continue to inspire, and help you explore the craving you find so fascinating.

Share the joy of the written word


New readers might be interested in this master list of all my stories, ranked by popularity. The up arrows indicate stories that have moved up the leaderboard, whilst new icons show stories that you might not have encountered yet.

Or there’s this list categorised by theme for those seeking a particular style of story. 

Do share your favourites!

Updated again with recent stories. How many have you climaxed to?

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