Try not to think of play partners as some kind of treasure to be found. Or even worse, some treasure to be won.

Instead think of how one might go about finding any new friend.

By being approachable, respectful, and engaging to talk to.

But you also need to do something that seems quite intimidating: you need to drop your own mask, and allow others to see behind it. Through this blog, thousands of complete strangers have come to know the details of my fantasies, and what I believe about not just sex, but life in general.

When you’re that candid, sometimes you don’t need to go find kindred spirits. Because they will find you.