Spanking Theatre

Spanking stories for the theatre between your ears



My dom has continually forgotten specific boundaries of mine and I’ve found myself having to stop in the middle of play and remind him of my limits. Is this a red flag? They aren’t little things, it’s things like not wanting to be slapped in the face and not liking being choked. How should I address this??

This doesn’t sound like forgetting. It sounds like he’s testing you to see how much he can get away with, and because you’ve stood up to him, he’s using slapping and choking as a way to reimpose his authority. This is completely wrong, and an obvious red flag.

In any d/s relationship, the power resides with the submissive alone. Subs cede control and give their consent. Subs set the boundaries, not doms. A dom who is incapable of respecting their partner’s boundaries clearly does not respect the precious human being they’re playing with.

The worry here is that choking is very hazardous, and requires a conscientious partner who you can absolutely trust. I’d worry about any partner who seemed to care more about their own gratification than their partner’s legitimate safety concerns.

Boundaries exist to separate consensual play from abuse. You decide where that boundary is drawn. If he can not respect that, you are putting yourself in peril.

Please, stay safe.

What do you think about collars and collaring? X

There are many different ways to think about collaring, the meaning varying depending on the time involved.

Long-term collaring is a form of consensual ownership, signifying the depth and durability of a kinky relationship. Since a sub only has one neck, this tends to imply a degree of exclusivity.

The collar can also offer a sense of reassurance, something to physically touch to allay anxiety when a couple are apart. Or a reminder to behave as its tightness presses against the throat. Or like Tolkien’s ring, it might embolden its bearer, granting super-powers of self-esteem and confidence.

Short-term collaring has a different meaning. Here the collar is worn as an aide, to help its wearer adopt a different persona. They might be a authoritative, no-nonsense professional during the working week, but want to spend the weekend as a sex slave. Here the collar signifies that whilst it being worn, the wearer intends to submit entirely to their partner’s whims.

It doesn’t even need to be a collar. It could be a gag or bridle, like the slaves in The Girl in the Mirror. Dressing up can also achieve the same purpose, which is why many adults like dressing up in school uniforms. They are effectively saying: for as long as I wear this, treat me accordingly.

And there is session collaring, where the collar is used as a prop during play. For instance, it might be worn secretly beneath clothing as a couple goes out for dinner. Or displayed in plain sight brazenly.

Perhaps with a cord tied to the front, dangling down between her breasts, right down between her lips, then up between her bottom cheeks, and up her back to be tied to the rear of her collar. Throughout the evening her partner might reach forward to stroke her neck discreetly, and tug the cord whenever her attention seems to wander.

There are many ways to play with collaring, because collars can be as unique as the one that wears it.

Permission to be erotically surprised

Kinky relationships are misunderstood by many. To an outsider, it might seem like the
power lies with the Dom – they after all give the orders and expect to be obeyed. They appear to be active, the ones who spank, fondle, inspect and fuck, whilst their submissive partner appears to be passive, merely a canvas for their controlling artist to draw upon.

But this is a serious misunderstanding. The closer you get the more apparent the real truth becomes.

Because the true power really lies with the Sub, because it is their desires that initiate any scene, and only their continuing consent sustains it. It’s the Dom who is bending to the
desires of their partner, and which they’re happy to satisfy.

Yet if a stranger was to suddenly grab you by the wrist, drag your forcefully over their knee and wrestle down your clothes before spanking you hard. That would not only be creepy, but blatantly illegal too.

Consent is giving permission to be erotically surprised.

When a Sub tells their partner they want to be spanked, exciting possibilities are suddenly unlocked. It gives your partner authority, leeway to start improvising, to decide how you will be punished – and pleasured.

The Dom might be the Director of the scene, but the Sub is the Producer: the one who initiates it, who sets the limits, and who can call a halt to the production if it ever veers too off-course.

A Sub is only pretending to give up power, because in reality they are the one at the centre of the scene, the one having their desires attended to. Just because they’re experiencing pain, doesn’t mean they’re not being worshipped.

You’ll see this theme in several of the stories here. At one extreme is the story Control which is a good example of so-called “Topping from the Bottom”, but there are also subtler examples like Christmas Present, Daydreaming and The Sit-Down Dance, where the instigation of spankings is more of a gentle nudge.

What unites these stories is that the submissive protagonists are not involuntary or passive participants, but actively engaged in the pursuit of desires they seek.

The most common message I receive from readers is: how do I get someone to spank me?

My advice is always the same.

The best dominant partners have a strong moral compass. They do not push their own desires on others. It’s not shyness, it’s basic politeness, they wait to be invited inside.

Your consent is the key that unlocks the door. Your consent suspends reality and makes possible a transient fantasy world. Your consent enables your fantasies.

Your consent will get your bottom spanked.

How would you spank a naughty, young girl who thinks she wants to be spanked, but has never been spanked as an adult before?

In a word, slowly.

Your first spanking should be more than just a rapid flurry of smacks to your bottom.

I begin by talking. I want to understand why those I spank are fascinated by spanking, sometimes I’ll have her write down her thoughts in advance, so the conversation is more candid, and less awkward.

I want to know what she seeks from her first spanking. Is it a desire to experience the stinging heat of a sore bottom, or a deep psychological need for discipline? Does she consider her spanking as play or punishment? Why does she consider herself naughty, and will she submit willingly or reluctantly?

I want to learn how hard she wants to be spanked, and which implements she would like to try. Has she spanked herself before, and what is her attitude to pain? We will agree a safe word, and I will impress upon her the importance of using it, even if it’s just to take a time-out.

I want to know about how she feels about her own body, whether the prospect of being exposed arouses or frightens her.

I ask her to politely ask for what she needs.

“Please Sir, may I have a good hard spanking on my bare bottom?”

And again.

And again.

I study her eyes. Reading all those words her tongue can’t utter.

If I feel I understand her, and what she needs, I’ll tell her to stand up, and explain why I’m going to ask her to pull down her panties.

Here she may confirm her consent, to acquiesce and submit to what’s coming, or assert her right to say no and go no further.

Once her panties have been handed over to me, I lead her to where her spanking will take place. The side of a bed is or sofa is the best for a first time, where she can lie over my lap horizontally, with her weight supported. I intend to spank her slowly after all, it’s better if she’s comfortable.

I like to arrange her at an angle, so her left is supported on the mattress, but her right leg is bent with her foot on the floor. This makes her left buttock flaccid, and her right buttock taut and firm, enabling her to feel two different sensations as I alternate my smacks between them.

And it reveals her slit, enabling me to keep an eye on how aroused she is becoming.

I don’t spank straight away, but begin by rubbing her cheeks, letting her get used to the warmth of my hand on intimate highly sensitive skin. As I rub, I ask her to repeat her affirmation.

“Please Sir, may I have a good hard spanking on my bare bottom?”

And again, until I hear the longing in her voice.

Until, quite suddenly, my rubbing stops, and I bring my open palm down on her taut right cheek.

A yelp breaks the silence. But I remain silent, allowing her to process the sensations of being spanked for the first time. Often a mew of satisfaction follows, or a moan as the surprise of the smack empties her lungs of its air.

I let her enjoy the warm sting in her cheek for a few more moments, then bring my open hand down again on the exactly the same spot as before.

Another yelp. I listen carefully. Such little sounds are so instructive. What is it I hear in there, satisfaction or resentment? Pleasure or discomfort?

Now I ask her: how was that?

What was it like to be spanked for the first time?

And then I listen.

I’m in no hurry. Tonight I shall spank her for as long as she wants me to. But for now, I want to share in her new discovery, to hear what it’s like to be spanked for the very first time.

The night is still young, and our adventure is only just beginning…

Ups and Downs: Part 1


A story of appreciation and discipline, in two parts

I’m standing in disgrace at the front of the class, in a classroom that’s not really a classroom. 

I must confess, I didn’t take my assignment seriously. I thought it was all a bit of a giggle. Now here I am, my back to the rest of the class and my dress hitched up above my waist. I can hear my classmates scribbling busily behind me, they’ve been warned that any dawdling and they’ll be dragged up here to join me. Even so, I wonder how many have risked looking up from their pages to sneak a peek at me.

I feel the tremble of approaching footsteps again. I hold my breath, bracing myself for what I know happens next. A single whack from a wooden ruler stings my left bottom cheek. I scrunch my mouth shut, I don’t want to give the class the satisfaction of hearing my discomfort.

Of course, the smack to my bum is more than just chastisement. It’s also my signal. I obediently lift my hands from the top of my head and reach downwards to my sides, my fingers sliding inside my knicker elastic. I bend at my waist, slowly pulling my panties all the way down to my ankles. From bitter experience I know if I attempt to pull down my underwear too quickly, I’ll get a volley of smacks across the backs of my thighs. 

So I must pull down my panties slowly… Very… Slowly… And that means lingering in the most shameful position of all. The one where my bare bum juts out towards the class, making my cheeks spread apart, admitting a breeze of cool air that tingles my most intimate parts. For several seconds as I lower my panties down my calves, I can’t help but reveal my bottom hole and the little slit that lies just beneath, and all its secret folds. The moment my panties reach my ankles I leap up, bolt upright, replacing my hands on the top of my head, my face burning, knowing I’ve just exposed my everything.

Behind me, I just know my classmates are surreptitiously looking up from their essays, sneaking sly looks at the pink patches now spreading across my newly exposed flesh. I know this because that’s exactly what I do when others occupy my current position. And then the footsteps recede again, and I’m left alone.




All too soon I hear the footsteps return. The next whack is on my bare bum, applied to the sore patch now developing on my right bottom cheek. This is my cue to bend down and pull up my panties – slowly of course – allowing all those witnessing my disgrace another good long look between my legs.

My skin is now exquisitely sensitive, I can feel the material of my underwear tickling as it passes up my thighs. Then there’s a moment when my gusset nestles between my intimate lips just before I roll the rest over the tender flesh of my newly spanked bottom. My obligation done, my hands fly back to the top my head, and I wait for the dread thud of approaching footsteps again.

On the next stinging whack, I’ll pull my panties down again. 

Whack, up, wait. 

Whack, down, wait. 

Up and Down. Up and Down.

My slow-motion spanking will continue until the ruler-wielder is satisfied I’ve learned my lesson. Though I must confess, when I’ve watched this exquisite bottom-warming show from the classroom seats: I’ve never wanted it to stop. 

Does that make me a bad girl?

Keep reading

Next in the alphabetical retrospective of past stories is Ups and Downs, a two part long-form story that explores the wonder of mentorship, and the appreciation of strict discipline. 

In fact, the major themes of this story with be familiar to any who have read and understood my last post on why we pull down your panties. If you haven’t, I’d recommend reading that first.

One key theme is the erotic theatre of the
undressing ritual, a deceptively simple act capable of flooding a submissive girl’s mind with a heady mixture of trepidation, excitement and shame.

But the story deals with deeper psychological themes, such as what it means to submit oneself to physical discipline. During the story you’ll encounter good girls, who submit willingly to their discipline, and so are rewarded accordingly. But you’ll also encounter a bad girl, haughty, stubborn and resentful, who attitude to a spanking is very different indeed.

Who would you prefer to answer to?

A strict governess who whacked your bare bottom, and sent you to bed angry and unsatisfied?

Or a strict headmistress who ensured you were always soaking wet before she punished you? One who always sent you away grateful that she cared enough to steer and discipline you?

You may read Ups and Downs, and make up your own mind…

The Alchemy of Anxiety

An anonymous reader writes:

This may be a bit odd, but I’m writing out of hope to gain some courage.

I’m in the midst of writing my physics dissertation and I’ve never cared so much about any work in my life. Doing the work taught me many things about my own capacity for intellectual heartbreak and triumph in equal measure. I am… proud of the work that I’ve done, yet deeply insecure about it, and perhaps above all, mortified by the thought of submitting it to the red ink of my advisor.

He’s been largely in the background for most of this process, but over all kind and patient, if blunt. Until very recently I didn’t understand that I could be so passionate about my work, and I’ll admit that I at first confused my own newfound perfectionism with a desire to please an intimidating authority figure—or at least avoid another serious talking to like the one he gave me early on in my work.

I introspected a lot about my authority issues (many), and tried to consider as objectively as possible that he might have a point, and decided to swallow my pride and keep trying. I am now glad that I did, I think. But I’m also apprehensive. I trust that he has my best interests in mind and doesn’t think badly of me, but I am deeply sensitive to criticism. And I know that criticism is both inevitable and, if given in good faith, vital for growth.

You may be wondering why I’m writing this to a spanking blog, although I wouldn’t be surprised if you understood completely: from reading your stories, I know that you’re deeply aware of the eroticism that may be found in the relationship between teacher and student, as well as in the learning process itself. It’s the lustful part of my brain, disconnected from reality, that wonders breathlessly what submitting to a different sort of humbling experience would be like: one experienced naked, across his lap.

I am eroticising a difficult experience to cope with it; the fantasy of accepting physical discipline from someone I respect and find attractive turns me on, while knowing that I must open myself up to criticism of my work terrifies me. Even so, I have now done a difficult thing by offering you my writing, my obvious kink for authority, and the knowledge that I’m a very naughty girl indeed, to be touching myself to the thought of a sound spanking from my mentor. Perhaps now, it may be easier to do the most difficult thing…

Thank you dear reader, for putting into words something that I expect many other readers of this blog will have felt themselves. It is common to eroticise difficult, awkward and embarrassing situations.

And this reveals a deeper truth:

Anxiety and fear are two separate emotions.

Some might think they’re the same, that anxiety is just a milder form of fear, but they’re not.

Anxiety originates from desire.

Fear originates from danger.

People eroticise situations that might otherwise be socially or physically painful. That’s why the most common sexual fantasies feature authority, punishment, nudity and humiliation. By fantasising about shame, we can take control it, like lightning in a bottle – and channel that powerful psychological energy into our minds’ pleasure centres instead. Safely, in the privacy of the bedroom.

If fear had the same psychological basis, the most common sexual fantasies would involve heights, snakes and creepy-crawlies. But they don’t. Fear is a primal response, a self-protection mechanism that’s billions of years old. It exists to keep us safe, from perils that could be lethal.

But anxieties arise from our wants: our desire to be liked, to be accepted, to be pretty, to be successful. All factors that might lead to us being considered socially and sexually attractive.

Those who consider authority figures erotic often fantasise about impressing them. They crave their attention, they want to be told they’re the cleverest, the most brilliant, or best-behaved.

That’s probably why the schoolgirl scenario is so popular, a chance to replay and eroticise your own memories. To imagine what it would be like if that teacher you had a crush on really was as strict as they were in your dreams. Your aversion to failure demands that even imaginary rule-breaking must have consequences. And for many, that means a good hard spanking on the bare bottom.

Many misinterpret the powerful urges of their own sexuality as
something bad, deviant or filthy. But in reality, your sexuality is a mental resource, as much an asset as your creativity, insight or concentration. The best erotic mentors are not motivated by their own gratification, but by a desire to teach others how to understand their own superpowers.

Your sexual energy is a fire, a means to transmute anxiety into pleasure. In a very personal act of alchemy…

Do you have any hard limits?

My hardest limit is consent.

I only play with consenting adults. And it’s important to me that the consent of my playmates arises from their own desires, and they should be emotionally mature enough to give it. Consent for submission should be eager and willing, which means I will not take advantage of those who are unhappy, bored or self-hating. I think this is a hard limit every responsible dominant should have.

Those who’ve read the naughty games series will know I’m relaxed about pee play,
which can actually complement spankings quite nicely. Poo is just an
occupational hazard of anal play. And menstrual blood is a just fact of
human biology, I’m very relaxed about that.

But I’m not keen on breaking the skin. I consider it brutish to draw blood – a failure of imagination, when there are so many imaginative non-damaging ways to punish. Marks on the bottom are fine, but the visible effects of a good spanking should be short-lived.

After all, isn’t discipline an opportunity for redemption? I like to think once spanked, the slate is wiped clean. At least, until the next misdemeanour…

How would you deal with a partner (female) who is constantly misbehaving and not doing as told. I tried to tell them that there would be consequences and I’d spank her but she just doesn’t listen and when I try to punish her she just keeps squirming to the point where I can’t do anything

First, you must understand that her brattiness is part of the game, and not a problem to be fixed.

Most people are very well-behaved: they spend their whole lives being polite, respectful and courteous. But when they’re in private, with their most intimate acquaintances, they want to express a different side of themselves.

They want to be transgressive, they want to challenge the rules they’ve spent their entire lives studiously obeying. They want to push the boundaries, knowing full well there might be painful consequences beyond.

That’s why spanking is such a popular fetish. In my experience intelligent, ordinarily well-behaved ladies love fantasising about being naughty for once, and the prospect of someone strict holding them to account makes their panties wet.

Perhaps your partner likes to struggle, talk to her about what she desires. Perhaps she fantasises about being tied up, and being rendered helpless. Or for someone strict to see through her bratty little games and properly take control of her chaotic mind.

Likewise, if she’s struggling because she actually doens’t like being spanked. Then stop. Just because you’re sexually dominant does not earn you any special privileges. Her preferences are just as valid as yours.

Always remember that kinky sex is just adult play. It is not forcing your desires on your partner, it’s about transforming another human being’s deepest desires into something that brings pleasure to you both.

Understand her, and align with what she needs.

Play your role.

Be strict.

And be the authority she secretly craves.

The Golden Rule

An anonymous reader asks:

A passage in “Coming of Age” really struck me:

“But I chatted like my
mentor had taught me, with honest curiosity rather than
self-aggrandising bravado, with the respect due to another human being.”

It got me wondering about a humanistic philosophy of sexual dominance.
I’m wondering if you’ve encountered anything I could read on or around
that subject?

Mutual respect is the cornerstone of
sexual dominance, it’s what separates consensual kinky activities from physical abuse. It is something that every good
BDSM player believes in: that those in our care should be developed and
lifted up, not suppressed and exploited. Consent is a precious gift, it should be handled with the reverance it deserves.

Respect for your fellow human beings is fundamental to a healthy sexual identity. Without it, sex becomes just a succession of transient conquests, complex individuals reduced to warm holes to fuck, driven by a immature, selfish desire for orgasmic satisfaction.

But how would you behave towards others if you could never, ever, achieve another orgasm?

There is a name for this philosophy: Asceticism. It involves eschewing sensual pleasures, of prioritising spiritual goals, and resisting desire. It is central to many great religions, including Christianity and Buddhism.

Now I’m not proposing readers swear an oath of celibacy, or adopt the lifestyle of a monk. But denial of sensual pleasures is an important aspect of BDSM play, and not just for submissives. The first stage of taking control over another is to master one’s own desires. Dominants should be mindful, both of their own bodies, as well as those of their partners.

Control of desire earns authority, control of the self leads to enlightenment.

And an enlighted mindful player attains superpowers.

So, dear reader, in answer to your question, I have no particular posts to suggest, because respectful dominance is a lifelong journey, guided by whatever philosophies you choose to follow, or faiths you believe.

Choose to live your life by The Golden Rule, the ethic of reciprocity.

It is an idea as old as civilisation itself.

It is simply…


Blog at

Up ↑